My husband Andrew, who began this blog in October 2007, died peacefully on September 3rd 2012, at the age of 83, after long and well-controlled illness culminating in a sudden, brief decline. He worked on his autobiography for years but never completed it. Instead he left behind various pieces of life writing which would have formed part of it. I will gradually include this material here, giving the dates on which the pieces were written. I'll also add some of my own reminiscences and items of information I have about him. At some point this blog will become an archive, without further additions. — Rosemary Nissen-Wade

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

A SWITCH FROM THE NEGATIVE

I was into my 50s before I fell into 'new age' thinking. I was very conservative, mainly born of fear and the inability to express what I was really thinking and feeling, that as a result of a suppressed childhood in which I grew up not knowing what love was. My parents, born in the Victorian era had the same problem. My dad was very creative but never really learned the express it until in his late 40s which was too late because he was dead at 59. My mum was scared all her life and tried to protect me from the things she feared. So in the past 30 years I've attracted a lot of experiences each of which has moved me away from the negative to the positive, and let me tell you I had heaps of negativity. One of the first things I did once I had a taste of different way of looking at life was to sign up for a rebirthing course. I discovered much later that none of the participants wanted me on it. Twenty years plus down the track (about two weeks ago on June 23rd) after years of trying to think positively and change the negative aspects of my life I was led to a process that turned my life around.

Carol Ann Roberts (until recently known as Tyicia) who taught me Theta Healing, went through my belief systems and turned them upside down and then imbedded new ones. An amazing process. For instance one of my beliefs was: "I have no point of view" and she cancelled that and replaced it with: "I see with Divine eyes" Another one was: "I am a nobody!" which she changed to: "I am Source". When I say she changed it to, she reaches inside you and taps into your own source and comes up with your own truth. Another one which made us both laugh was "I am a disgusting ratbag" which became "I am most precious and unique" And she explained that we are all unique on a spiritual level, just as no snowflake is the same, from a Divine perspective we all have our own uniqueness.

There were a few others - nine in all, and for the next week my body and mind went through what I can only describe as "a rebirth" as it adjusted to these new truths. Throughout the following days I would say them to myself and this morning I woke feeling energetic and positive even though I didn't get to sleep until 2am. And I've become very calm and very clear about my direction.